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The Impact of Relationships on Social Development

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THE IMPACT OF RELATIONSHIPS ON SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT

Over the last few months, I have seen a consistent theme emerge with clients and families within our communities, centered around personal health, well-being and relationships. 

As we are focusing on the importance of mental health this year, I thought it would be good to talk about the impact of relationships on social development – especially in that of our children in their early stages of life. 

Modern life seems to be filled with more stresses as humanity progresses. From a social emotional perspective, as a society, many of us are struggling. Our emotions are high, and we are feeling anxiety and uncertainty more than ever before. Once felt, this stream of thought and instability transfers to all aspects of life. But what if I told you that there is an intervention model designed by a psychologist, Stanley Greenspan that acknowledges our emotional social development and how it stems from relationships developed soon after birth? As health professionals we can use this model to support our families, both parents and children in developing the skills to maintain healthy relationships from the first 3 months of life! At Explore and Soar, we reference this model and use it as a guide in our intervention sessions. It is called the DIRFlootime Model; a Developmental, Individual Differences and Relationship based model that acknowledges each child’s unique differences and uses relationships and connections to establish a strong emotional social connection to further enhance development. This model is integrated into our sessions by following the child’s lead and adapting their ideas to enhance these skills through play. 

So why DIRFloortime? 

Well for us it aligns perfectly with our core values and supports our ability to develop connections and relationships with all our clients. But most importantly, it is an intervention model that acknowledges the emotional social development from birth into our adult years. It allows us as clinicians to work through developmental milestones from an early age. It is also a model firmly based on parent coaching; supporting our client’s parents/carers to further develop the skills needed to support healthy relationships. 

So how can we support our communities and families in developing these skills from birth to increase emotional development, resilience and social engagement, in order to avoid seeking intervention at an older age? This is done through awareness, education and acknowledging that the first months up to two years of life are of great importance when developing healthy relationship skills. 

In the first 3 months of life the foundational skills of regulation begin. This is the beginning of co-regulation between the parent and child and fosters shared attention; where the baby can seek the mother’s attention and they respond or vice versa. This then becomes the child’s foundation to a secure attachment. Attachment between the caregiver and the baby. The start of co-regulation is around the caregivers/mother’s ability to understand the baby’s wants, needs and desires. It’s the ability to answer cues and answer questions like are they hungry, uncomfortable, do they require a nappy change or are they in fact tired? The connection and relationship is based on love and learning to soothe the baby, creating a positive experience and strong connection. This ability comes from the baby having their own unique cries or cues to indicate to the mother or caregiver what they need. This is where the baby and caregiver become entrained with one another forming a bond; the foundations to co-regulation.

In an ideal world this seems simple, easy and realistic. However, every baby enters this world differently, every mother has a different experience and every baby has different sensory processing capacities that then impact their own biological rhythms. There simply is no one size fits all when it comes to taking care of an infant. 

As a new baby comes into the world, parents are presented with an array of challenges. Difficulty sleeping, reflux and feeding concerns, high stress births, babies being unable to settle or babies that simply do not enjoy being touched or soothed. These difficulties that arise for every parent, have a flow on effect with little to no sleep, stress, anxiety, self-blame and hormonal changes being merely a few of the impacts on our parents. This too then has an affect on the relationships that surround mum and dad, including their relationship with one another.  

This is all normal. But why don’t we talk about it more? Why do we gloss over the early stages of parenthood and try to make it look as easy as possible to the outside world? I remind my clients and friends that as parents, you simply are NOT a failure for not being able to soothe your baby. The only way you will ever fail is when you stop trying to understand your child. It is about asking questions and seeking medical advice when required, but also not being afraid to ask for help from your family and friends. 

It takes a village to raise a child. 

As OT’s we provide an extra level of support to parents, children and families. We understand and work with children in motor movement patterns at a young age to support their discomfort and the development of their sensory systems, including their sleep-wake cycles. We have the skills and ability to discuss with you your routines and support in identifying cries and ability to connect with your babies. We also acknowledge where other health professionals’ unique strengths can provide positive impacts for you and your child. But most importantly for us, our skills lie in the development of connection. We look to support our parents/caregivers by building the skills to interact, laugh, smile and play together with your child from a young age. We work with you to build upon the ability to co-regulate emotions, to keep you calm in challenging circumstances and to be present in order to assist in the soothing and engagement of your child. 

If you have any questions around the foundational skills of co-regulation and shared attention please don’t hesitate to reach out. The first three months with your baby’s life is the starting point to all engagement, self-regulation and social skill development for life. My hope is that in having these conversations, we will increase our ability to ask for help when needed. We will foster strong, resilient children who have confident, calm parents who are a little kinder to themselves in challenging circumstances. If we make an effort to start from birth, we can positively impact the mental health of our children as they get older. I know I’d love to see our children’s quality of life, self-esteem and love for themselves be greater in future generations. 

In our socials this month we will go through some examples of challenges and strategies that can help to support you. Take a look at our instagram or facebook to see more. Please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need a helping hand or would like further information on how we could help you!

Until next time,
Jess

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED APRIL 7, 2021

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The Emotional Continuum

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THE EMOTIONAL CONTINUUM

Emotions; the one thing that many people find hard to acknowledge, understand and express freely. 

Yet they are the one thing that binds us together. They are a constant in out lives, changing as we navigate through day to day life. Our emotions live on a continuum and on any given day we eb and flow between them. 

At Explore and Soar, we describe this by using the terms optimal band of arousal and window of tolerance. Each allow us as humans to function optimally on any given day, to be able to maintain a home and  hold down a steady job as adults. For our children, being able to participate in everyday self-care activities, maintain engagement at school for learning and be flexible and dynamic in their thinking and feelings when socialising and playing with peers, is obtained when their optimal band of arousal is reached. 

There are many everyday functions and aspects of our lives that are relying on us to live in our optimal band of arousal, in order to attend and achieve these expectations. However, this is not always achievable and on any given day, our body and minds experience a range of emotions from our internal and external environments. When this happens, our ability to remain in an optimal band of arousal is not always achievable. Instead, we start moving on the emotional continuum either into a high arousal state of survival with responses of fight, flight, fright or freeze where an array of emotions and behaviours can become apparent or alternatively into a low arousal state where fatigue, tiredness or sickness can become apparent. 

Our ability to move consistently on the emotional continuum is guided by natural and unique instincts. 

By doing so, our body is expressing how we are feeling in the moment by telling our mind and body to respond in a particular way. As an example, if we are beginning to feel overwhelmed and stressed, moving into a heightened state, we are required to slow down to allow our body to rest. We can all become unstuck in this state from time to time, when we have difficulty regulating our emotions appropriately and being able to respond to our internal and external environment in an appropriate way, such as size of problem vs reaction. This is where the foundational emotional regulation skills of co-regulation from a young age and the development of self-regulation capacities is fundamental in supporting our children, but also enhances our adaptability and flexibility in all situations when we are older.

Take a look at our previous blog on co-regulation and self-regulation strategies >

In everyday life, if a child is expressing themselves with an action or emotion, that is their way of asking for help. As social beings we do not like expressing ourselves in a way that is perceived to be out of the norm, yet when things are not going ok for young children, their way of and asking for help is through emotive behaviour. As adults it is our job to be role models, provide support and teach them how to express their emotions appropriately. We must offer support to them as they move through these feelings, whilst trying to understand the situation at hand. That’s not always easy. Sometimes we as adults alone are unable to figure it out. This is where we as occupational therapists working within emotional regulation and sensory processing capacities can come in and help, to further breakdown what is going on, determine what is impacting our children and to determine the best strategy to support them in their daily experiences, on their own individual emotional continuum.

As occupational therapists there are a range of strategies and intervention options that we can do to support your whole family in better understanding each other’s emotional continuum. 

Our ultimate goal is to work successfully through everyday activities and allow you and your children to live your life to the fullest.  

Regulation strategies: As occupational therapists we can determine where each individual’s band of arousal sits on the emotional continuum. Once identified, we develop goals and implement strategies to support increased time in optimal throughout the day. Goals and strategies are targeting the development of co-regulation strategies with parents/caregivers and loved ones, self-regulation strategies and increasing the independence in identifying how your body is feeling and reacting, then completing strategies to calm, additionally reducing the time frame and recovery time if their emotions heighten. These are all powerful approaches to supporting our children in order to be successful in everyday activities. 

Take a look at our previous blog on co-regulation and self-regulation strategies >

Sensory processing activities: Utilising our individual sensory needs helps facilitate and develop regulation and achievement in maintaining an optimal band of arousal. Well known strategies such as heavy work, respiration and roughhousing strategies can be quick sensory activities in your everyday life in order to facilitate this. Over the years we have written about the benefits of all these strategies and you’ll see them regularly in our social media posts. This is because the benefits are paramount. This is also why you will see us in sessions working with our children with things like whistles, utilising oral motor strategies to support the development of skills, and individualised heavy work strategies (movement with resistance such as push, pull, lift, carry) to help achieve these outcomes. 

TRE (Trauma Release Exercises): Known as trauma release exercises are a simple yet innovative series of exercises that assist in the body in releasing deep muscular patterns of stress, tension and trauma. TRE can be implemented through an active way of exercises that activate the natural reflex mechanism of shaking or vibrating that releases muscular tension, required for calming down the nervous system. I have been utilising this strategy as a self-regulation and self-care tool for myself consistently since 2013. Due to the extreme benefits of TRE and my own love of it I then studied his intervention approach and have completed my qualification in 2018-2019 to become a trained trainer. Since then, I have been implementing these strategies within our sessions with our children where needed through a passive, non-invasive and safe way. This strategy has been successfully implemented with adults and children in altering their band of optimal arousal and increasing their control and confidence in sitting in the emotional continuum. Do not hesitate to seek further knowledge and information from us on this method.

Cognitive emotional strategies: When working on the emotional continuum, sometimes using sensory processing and bottom up strategies are effective, but can be complimentary providing top down cognitive strategies to assist in the refinement of knowledge and applying these skills in social situations or transfer these skills in everyday environments, including home, school (classroom and playground), and the community. Some strategies you will see us utilising in sessions are concepts of ‘Zones of Regulation’, ‘Size of Problem vs Reaction’, ‘The Alert Program’, ‘The Incredible Flexible You Series’ and ‘The Social Thinking Detectives’. These strategies for us are generally used once the development of the above mentioned skills have been supporting each individual’s emotional continuum and then building these skills on top of. 

As a team we are always building our knowledge and exploring further strategies and intervention approaches to enhance our children’s emotional capacities and independence. Ultimately we are all learning to understand and identify their emotions on a daily basis. The emotional continuum is so important to us as it allows our children to build their confidence, self-worth, self-awareness and to develop strong foundational blocks in order to achieve success in their life. Don’t hesitate to chat to us further about how we can support you and your children with their emotional regulation capacities. 

Until next time,
Jess

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED MARCH 3, 2021

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Multidisciplinary Approach

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MULTIDISCIPLINARY APPROACH

Building a multidisciplinary team involves a range of professionals from different disciplines, working in harmony to provide care. 

At Explore and Soar, a multidisciplinary approach is about building a strong team around our families, in order to provide high quality, best evidence intervention, coaching and strategies to reach the desired outcomes of each individual and family. 

This process can be somewhat overwhelming but incredibly powerful and rewarding.  

So let’s start by talking about the definition of multidisciplinary care, in order to give you a little more detail on what’s involved.

The following definition outlines the objectives as well as some of the challenges involved in the provision of multidisciplinary team care:

Multidisciplinary care – when professionals from a range of disciplines work together to deliver comprehensive care that addresses as many of the patient’s needs as possible. This can be delivered by a range of professionals functioning as a team under one organisational umbrella or by professionals from a range of organisations, including private practice, brought together as a unique team. As a patient’s condition changes over time, the composition of the team may change to reflect the changing clinical and psychosocial needs of the patient.

Mitchell G.K., Tieman, J.J., and Shelby-James T.M. (2008), Multidisciplinary care planning and teamwork in primary care, Medical Journal of Australia, Vol. 188, No. 8, p.S63.

So now that we know what it involves, how do you find the right team?

Trying to navigate the world of health professionals and creating a seamless connection between each discipline can become somewhat arduous. Deciding on the right individuals that best suit your family and that work well together as a team can take years to build. Having a strong connection and trust with each member of your team is essential. 

It’s important to remember that nothing worth having, ever comes easily. Building the right team can take time and may mean that you will be seeing multiple different professionals until you find the right ones for you. 

But here is the key to successfully building a great multidisciplinary team – it all starts with just one connection and finding that first perfect fit.

Whether you are just starting your journey in the allied health world or you have been working with different professionals for years, exercise patience and keep searching for that first perfect fit. Once you find one professional that you trust, everything will change for the better. This will have a flow on effect with the rest of the required team members. Often if you find a great fit with your OT, they can then recommend a wonderful speech pathologist or physiotherapist that would be the best fit for your family. 

Personally, I too am building my own allied health team after my recent accident.

A team that I can trust, connect to and one that fits seamlessly with my values and goals. One that will support me as I continue to embark on my journey back to full health. In doing so, I have learnt the complexities behind my own injuries, long term implications and affects I will be working through and on, for the years to come. My own team is now quickly building around me in order to personally help me through these challenges, and this is what I hope and wish for you. A strong team to build you up, to inform, educate and support you in the decisions you make for you, your child and your family. 

Professionally speaking, working as a part of a multidisciplinary team brings me so much joy! I have been working alongside some fabulous and highly qualified clinicians for the last decade and have witnessed the benefits of multiple disciplines coming together first hand. 

As occupational therapists we work closely with a range of allied health professionals; speech pathologists, physiotherapists, psychologists and chiropractors, just to name a few. The real power of collaboration lies in open communication and the transference of strategies across our therapy intervention sessions. 

Our love for working within multidisciplinary teams to build support around our clients, families and communities continues to be one of our greatest strengths and passions at Explore and Soar. We are always looking at exploring the best ways to support our families. 

At Explore and Soar we are always listening to the needs of our clients. We pride ourselves on being able to assist you in building a high quality allied health team that achieves your desired goals. So please never hesitate to reach out and ask us any questions that you may have! We want nothing but the best for you, your child and your family – and we won’t stop until that is delivered with a team that you trust.

Over the next month you will see some posts on our social media detailing how occupational therapists work with other allied health professionals to achieve our clients goals. Follow us on Instagram or Facebook (links below) and learn about the ways in which a multidisciplinary team can work together to achieve your goals. 

Until next time,
Jess

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED SEPTEMBER 2, 2020

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Emotional Regulation

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EMOTIONAL REGULATION

Today I want to speak about the importance of emotional regulation. Not only its development and significance in our children’s lives, but in our own as parents, caregivers and individuals. 

Emotional regulation is an important skill that is developed over time. Beginning in childhood, its development is a key milestone. Commencing with the foundational skills of co-regulation and leading into self-regulation in toddler and childhood years and eventuating into emotional intelligence in adulthood, it supports everything we do during our lives.

Self-regulation is the ability to notice, grade and modulate your own feelings, ultimately learning to respond appropriately to them. It is the ability to naturally adapt to those around you or the situation at hand. This process won’t always begin naturally with some children, some find it challenging to express themselves and others occasionally mis-interpret information that allows them to optimally adjust to their surroundings.

Emotional regulation is at the crux of everything we do. 

It starts in utero and further develops via a connection with your parents once born. It is the foundation of the connection between parents and their child from birth, that creates the building blocks for our first stage of emotional development; co-regulation.

This process allows children to learn, explore and understand what it feels like to be soothed, especially in unfamiliar or uncomfortable situations. As infants, our parents offer affection and protection from the world as we enter into it. Throughout our earliest months of life, our foundations are being solidified. We are opening our eyes, processing more and beginning to push boundaries. 

As we continue to grow, we are connecting, becoming more alert and adapting to the world around us. This is done so through our sensory systems and the motivation to learn about new surroundings. 

Co-regulation involves a mutual understanding and safety net that our parents or caregivers provide, keeping us safe as we test boundaries and explore the world. This sense of comfort can sometimes give us that little extra push we need when new scenarios or uncertainty may arise. These experiences, along with meeting others, allow us to learn some essential non-verbal social cues, beginning our journey into self-regulation. 

We begin to learn self-regulation by sharing and working through our feelings. Having people around us modeling, teaching and supporting us to learn how to manage emotions, allows us to appropriately deal with feelings. Most people develop these skills by the time they enter their teenage years.

But what if we couldn’t learn how to self-regulate emotions?What if we didn’t feel safe in our surroundings?What if we missed all the non-verbal social cues from people in our family growing up?

What if we didn’t understand the emotions we had or had any control over them – not knowing how to self-soothe or react appropriately to a situation? This is what our children go through daily before being about to self-regulate.Children have difficulty understanding their body and the many feelings that they encounter day to day. So how do we support them through this and encourage development?

It can be very overwhelming as a parent or caregiver. The fatigue and ongoing support needed to provide guidance can be exhausting. As soon as we, the adults get overwhelmed and stressed, our capacity to cope and remain in a regulated state too, gets altered. Our own ability to regulate ourselves and cope in our everyday life is challenged. Often we are faced with a sense of guilt – not being able to cope with emotion on top of emotion.

So, how can we support you but also support your children in managing their self-awareness and emotional regulation for resilience, empathy and emotional intelligence? We thought we would offer up some strategies for you, the parent or caregiver to best take care of you and your family. These are:

  • Checking in; asking yourself ‘what do I need to do to be my best self and what does my partner need to do to be their best self?’. Make a note for today, for the week for the month and for the term.
  • The everyday essentials: sleep, good food, and staying hydrated. If you’re sleeping and eating well then you are supporting your body in the best way, having energy to work through the day
  • Setting weekly intentions: set 3 realistic activities to achieve in the week that would make a difference to you and your family. One for yourself, one for your children and one for your family as a whole.
  • Daily Intentions: sitting down and making a plan for each day to work towards these goals for the week. Do the important things first.
  • Build your tribe: don’t be afraid to ask for help and reach out to those in your community.
  • Breathe and Move: find what works for you. Mindfulness, exercise or even having coffee with a friend. Take a moment and a deep breath with things get too stressful. 

Once you’ve taken care of your own emotional well-being, look to your children. They too need support and strategies to continue to grow and develop their minds, empathy and social connections. The below strategies can be used before and after interactions, or even sometimes in the moment. 

  • Build Body awareness: move, explore and climb. Get your children using their core and bodies in challenging ways. This increases their gross motor skills, posture control but also builds upon their body awareness and understanding themselves in space. 
  • Experience emotions: let your children experience a range of emotions, help them understand what these emotions are and how to work through them by discussing their feelings.
  • Modeling: don’t be afraid to get on the floor and act silly, expressing your emotions and how your body responds. Act out how you self-regulate and what strategies work for you to calm your body. Modeling emotional regulation strategies is very powerful for our children.
  • Repair: Never forget the importance of repair. Talking and working through a situation to help provide clarity, understand perspectives and to emotionally interact with others is very powerful. Our children need to know when to say sorry and why. 

These strategies don’t always work for our children in the moment or when they are in a heightened state. It’s also ok to let them feel the emotion and allow it to eventually pass. In these moments, you can employ strategies to offer support if they attempt to reach out, these include: 

  • Remaining available: remaining open and available to your child to let them know you are there as reassurance (even if sometimes they are telling you to “go away”)
  • Ice chips or cold packs; chewing on ice chips, ice blocks or having ice packs available is a natural body reset. The coolness will help the child regulate their body temperature and start to cool down, inadvertently calming their emotions..
  • Providing deep pressure or hugs (heavy work and deep pressure is a natural calmer and regulator). Each child reacts to this differently; some love hugs, others love to throw, hit or kick things. It is finding safe activities and strategies for them at that moment.
  • Phrases of reassurance that you can offer up such as – ‘You are safe, It’s ok, and I love you’
  • Respiration and breathing activities: bubbles, water,  or even a cup with a straw are all ways to practice breathing in order to calm your child down. 

Your own emotional regulation and health as an individual and as a parent is a central priority. In order for you to be a good parent, you need to self soothe and look after your own well being. If you are not ok, then your children are not ok. Please implement and give these strategies listed above a go to aid or expand upon what already works for you and your family. If you have any additional questions, thoughts or ideas, please do not hesitate to contact the Explore and Soar team, as our passion lies in helping our families on all levels. Supporting our families and building our children up to have great emotional awareness for themselves and empathy for others is perhaps one of the greatest things we as therapists get to do.

Hope to hear from you soon,

Jess

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED MARCH 4, 2020

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Parent Therapist Relationships

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PARENT THERAPIST RELATIONSHIP

With 2020 now well underway and with intentions set for the new year, it’s finally time for us to reconnect with our clients and families after the Christmas and New Year break.

The beginning of a new year is always a cherished time for many. After a well deserved break, it’s time to go back to work, school and to start achieving those new found goals.

Over the summer break, our children have in fact been doing a lot of work – setting their new found skills acquired in 2019 into action. The implementation of these skills during the break is often unseen but it is still an important aspect of our intervention goals. Times of play and rest are when our children are integrating and consolidating all their skills and new learnt behaviours. The break from education and routine allows time for the brain to consolidate new pathways and integrate them into everyday life and activities. In fact, one of my favourite parts about returning to work after the Christmas break is hearing all the stories of growth and new found goals being achieved. 

As the new year and the new term begins, it’s important for us to connect with parents and caregivers and determine what their needs and intentions are for the year ahead. This is done by communicating and reconnecting through storytelling. We are evaluating and discussing with them what their child has achieved the previous year, what goals they would like to achieve for the year ahead and what the next 6, 12 or 24 month action plans are. 

This is the time where we ensure that our parents and caregivers are really heard. 

It’s important that we work in collaboration to support our children and their families to reach their desired goals. We pride ourselves on being open, honest and working through each challenge diligently with you. We are passionate therapists that will employee a range of strategies whilst working with individual needs, respecting your values, parenting styles and unique qualities to find success. 

How we achieve this is through negotiation, program planning, service delivery and treatment modality options and education on a range of therapy services (inclusive of all allied health services available, not just OT). After listening to your concerns, stories and goals, we will break down these conversations in a way that is meaningful and understandable to each families needs. We set out your ideal, real and individual world options, creating strategies to deliver ongoing services, to assist with the agreed upon plan.

What I love most about my job is being able to provide a service that suits your own individual treatment model. Being able to provide these services to families within their own home, school or local community is incredibly rewarding. Within the comfort of your own home, we are able to work towards you family’s strengths, support you to achieve success and then facilitate change in all desired areas. This continues to inspire and motivate myself to persist to push and support our communities families more. 

Working within the family home is the most desired environment for us as OT’s, as it allows us to work collaboratively with families and children during our sessions. We also work actively and are flexible in interacting with the child’s school setting. We have worked in a range of different schools in the Newcastle to Muswellbrook/Scone regions and are continuing to expand our outreach and support this coming year. 

Working with each school requires a different and individualised assessment. Each school and family have their own goals, strengths and challenges which require some flexibility and support on our behalf. 

We actively participate in goal setting and planning meetings with teachers, run groups and/or individual sessions within the school day, complete teacher training and we host parent and teacher information nights. It’s important for us as OT’s to recognise that the support offered to each and everyone one of our families is different, depending on their desired outcomes. 

As we are in the midst of these vital parent-therapist conversations, I am finding so much joy in hearing all the positivity and recent achievements from our families. Their goals, motivation and support to always seek the best for their children inspires me to keep seeking and searching for the best intervention strategies. The relationship between a parent and therapist is so special, and unique to each family. As parents, you all work so hard to assist your children and it’s truly a blessing to be able to help improve and empower your child’s life.

I am looking forward to further supporting our families this year and ensuring that each of their voices are always heard. In 2020 it is my utmost goal to continue to strengthen Explore and Soar’s parent-therapist relationships, to achieve physical, mental, social and spiritual growth for each and every one of our families. 

The positive feedback following the holiday period is a reminder that parent-therapist relationships really do matter. It is one of the most important aspects of any intervention with a child and their family. One that I and the team at Explore and Soar continue to live by. 

Please don’t hesitate to share with us how we can continue to support you and your family. May 2020 be a year of growth and success for all. It’s time to get to work!

– Jess

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED FEBRUARY 5, 2020

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